The Way

I got to come up to KC yesterday and be with my mom, dad and brother and it has been a good time. Mom has really taken a down turn and sleeps most of the time. When she is awake, she is always very sweet and smiles all the time. She is regularly confused and then will be very clear for a few minutes and then back to sleep. It is a bittersweet time with most of the time just being very sweet. Dad and James are doing pretty well and I think I am doing okay. James and I went to the funeral home yesterday and picked out the casket and vault and got a pretty good handle on what needs to be done. We thought it best to deal with these issues while we were not totally emotional. I really think the things we chose will be very honoring to mom and also meet her wishes for her service to be very modest. I commented that mom would like to have her funeral where she is not even mentioned at all. She is just that modest and wants no attention drawn to herself. I obviously did not get that from her. ...

And . . . so it goes with my mom. She had a good morning and is now having a bad afternoon. The pain is really difficult to manage and it seems that will be the nature of it for the next few days. I talked to my dad about an hour ago and he said that mom slept decently last night but he sounded tired. His mode is to sleep when mom is sleeping and then be up when she is, whenever that is. I leave early tomorrow to go up and relieve him a little, as much as he will let me. I am sitting in the gym right now waiting on the jv to begin their match against Ezell and then the varsity plays. We are undefeated in the district and Ezell has one loss. If we win, we have district outright and if we lose, we will both be tied for first. It appears we might get some rain today but I am not holding my breath. I do not think it is really much of a chance. Soccer plays at 6p at Goodpasture and it is pretty much a must win for us for district tournament seeding purposes. We really want to be in the opp...

Mom is now on oral morphine and it appears to be taking care of the pain. This whole pain management thing is a tricky thing it seems. In my mind, the switch to morphine is a switch to a more critical step in the dying process. Mom continues to be upbeat and pretty quick in her thinking but it is obvious that the morphine is slowing her mental processes and her memory is not as good. All common experiences with morphine the way I understand it. Both Shelbi and Morgan won their district games last night. Volleyball won in 3 games and soccer beat David Lipscomb 5-0 which I have to tell you is quite a surprise that we got them by that many. Our girls came out ready to play, beat them to the ball, and generally played really well. Morgan got to start and is really playing very strong right now at defender. Pretty fun to watch both of the girls play. Now they need to play well tomorrow night as well with district games on the schedule. I got a 5-miler in today after running 11 yesterday wi...

The title of this blog is a play off of "rain, rain, go away", but is pretty indicative of what mom is going through right now. They upped her meds last night and then it was not enough. She had a pretty bad night and the hospice nurse came back during the night and the dr. made the decision to start morphine. It just seems like all of this is escalating so quickly. It is obvious that the tumor in her brain is growing and very active. I talked to mom this morning and she did not complain but did say the sensation was unlike anything she had ever felt before. I am scheduled to fly to KC Fri. and may have to go sooner if things continue to progress like they are. It is just amazing how quickly things seem to be changing. I woke up many times during the night praying for mom and knew that something was up with her. I guess God was letting me know that mom needed prayer during the night. Both of the girls play tonight and I will update how they come out. Both are very big matches...

Talked to my dad a few minutes ago and mom has had a couple of days that have been less than stellar. They have upped her pain medication today to stem the pain that seems to grow increasingly more severe. Of course, she never complains (a quality I obviously did not get from her) and she is always trying to encourage any one who calls or visits. She seems to grow weaker by the day and is taking longer to get ready for the day. It is an odd thing this cancer. It is mean, vicious, and bent on destroying my mom's body. She is determined to not let it steal her humor and good spirits. The plan is for me to make it up there this weekend and relieve my dad and brother. Mom and dad both tell me they are missing me being around. My dad's college buddy who lost his wife to cancer two months ago has been visiting the last couple of days and is a great encouragement and help to my dad. I am thankful that dad has someone to talk to and confide in. The girls have no games today and we are...

I started out in KC yesterday morning coming home from my mom and dad's, headed to work and try to catch up on some things that had to be done in the office and then climbed in the car to head to Jackson for Morgan's soccer game. We lost to USJ 1-0 (again) and it appeared as though they had some help from the officiating. We are very evenly matched and their girls are very good kids. We play Jackson Christian this morning and then head back to home. Shelbi is in Franklin playing volleyball. They won two matches last night and play most of the day today. Sondra just left Jackson to head back and be there with Shelbi today. I think they won both matches pretty handily. Mom had a good day yesterday and I talked to her late last night. My brother and sister-in-law are staying with my folks this weekend to just help out as needed. I am so thankful they are closer and can get to my folks as needed. I am planning on going back to KC next weekend unless I need to go earlier. Thanks ag...

I got to spend the past couple of days with my mom and dad and really enjoyed the time. It is obvious that mom is declining physically. She continues to have a great attitude and good spirits but the pain seems to be increasing which means increased pain management. The hospice folks have been wonderful and have answered all of our questions. It was good to see my brother and wife and my nephew and former sister-in-law on this trip as well. The next few weeks and days will be interesting for all of us to begin to navigate together. My dad continues to do pretty well. Thanks for praying for my mom and dad. It is obvious that people are praying. We appreciate it very much.