Oh, To Make a Change

I am sure that many from my generation (basically, not as old as dirt, but not young either) thought of Michael Jackson when you read the title. It is true, that without change, we will not become who we are designed to be. I really am one that says that I embrace change, but actually at times, I take change very hard.

We have been through some amazing change in recent days at my job. Many have lost their jobs and that is always difficult. Many people have been displaced. From all that I hear, my employer did a very fair job of taking care of those displaced by offering career counseling and a number of other helpful resources.

I experience some survivor's guilt every time there is a downsizing in employees and always remain grateful that I get to do what I get to do. My personal challenge is to never grow lazy or complacent in my job or in any phase of my life. I am beginning to learn that change really can be a very positive thing and without change, we would die.

My head very quickly gets to the decisions that were made. My heart is lagging behind a little. I have friends and co-workers effected by this change. I fully trust that God has each of them in His hands. He is not, nor was He surprised. I trust our leaders who had to make some very difficult decisions.

I am committed to never become complacent or entitled. It is poor stewardship of the talents and gifts that God has provided me. You and I are of value because He brings value to our lives. In following Christ, I must constantly be about change, because as Henry Blackaby says, "I cannot go with God and stay where I am."

Make that change.

I am NOT . . .

I realize with a title like that I am potentially opening myself to a lot of sarcasm from those who know me well. I am NOT a lot of things:
- a great athlete
- a math whiz (Sondra is keenly aware of this one)
- very good at staying up late (I get up too early I suppose)
- very quiet in the stands when watching ballgames (thus give me a mic and let me announce)
- a very good romantic (confession on Valentine's Day)
- an extrovert (I have an adapted style of relating to others and genuinely like people, just my strength is gained in solitude)
- an unselfish person
- non-judgmental
- gracious as my default
- on and on, ad nauseum

What I am longing NOT to be is the center of my universe. I am really good at convincing myself that the world and God for that matter, revolve around me. It shows itself in so many ways. You might be able to relate to a couple and unfortunately, you have seen these in me.
- hollering at officials/refs who are lazy and do not get in position to make calls
- hollering at drivers who go slow in the fast lane and who just generally do not get out of my way
- look in Scripture for how I can overcome sin & never acknowledge He has already overcome it and I cannot overcome it on my own
- use Scripture to prove my point rather than help someone else know of God's grace
- on and on, ad nauseum.

What I am really NOT is . . . the center of it all. Christ is and through His grace I am realizing and living that way more and more.

If you have not read, Die Young, by Hayley & Michael DiMarco, then don't if you are not really interested in burying yourself in Christ. It is a "good" read, but a painful one for me.

Huh?

I, many times find myself saying, "huh?" when people try to lead the conversation towards anything too very deep. I am pretty simple minded. Lately, I have been thrown into conversations related to chemistry, geometry, and even Calvinism. Schnikeees! I guess I should have paid more attention in high school, college and seminary. I know enough about each one to be really dangerous.

I mean no disrespect, I just do not understand why people want to battle over everything. I am not Michael Jackson struggling with, "I'm a lover, not a fighter," but I am concerned that many would rather fight than win. Now you are saying, huh? Fight just for the sake of fighting?

Have you ever known people who are not happy unless they are fighting or causing trouble? Seems like an oxymoron, I know, but some people are only "happy" when they are mad or fighting. At least that is my assessment.

Here is what I believe and know: Christ died for all. Not all will accept Him. My role is to help others understand how much God loves them.My delight is to bring Him glory and to help others come to know Christ is a very real way where they allow Christ to transform their lives. Sondra and I have welcomed a Chinese student into our home this school year and we are intentional in creating an environment around her so that she can learn and understand how much Christ loves her. We are praying that she will accept Him as her Lord and Savior.

I can argue a number of different ways. I can "prove" alot of things. I am a sinner in need of a Savior. Thankful in His grace that He has provided a way for me to be back in right relationship with Him through the sacrifice of His Son.

Sharing Grace

I aptly titled this entry as sharing grace rather than giving grace. If I am giving grace, it is incredibly limited. My storehouse of grace is basically non-existent. I am not a grace-filled person. On the contrary, I am pretty much a judgmental person when left to my own devices. I mean, why do people do such stupid things at times? Why would they choose to  . . . (you fill in the blank) when it is obvious that making that decision will end in pain and despair.

Yep, I am judgmental. I know how things ought to be done. I have read Scripture, watched people choose destruction over life, so all you have to do is ask me and I will tell you that you are stupid. I will even look down my nose at you while I do it.  I just really am that good.

And . . . I am a sinner who has been miraculously saved by God's grace. I have no grace of my own to give, but I am learning to share His grace. Slowly, painfully, I am learning. I am learning that what He desires of me is to bring Him glory in all things. That includes my thoughts, emotions, actions, words, and well, all things. Why at 48 am I just now beginning to understand what He longs for of me. It really is just about my surrender to Him and in that, all things are included. I cannot give grace but I can sure share it, but only because He has allowed me to be a recipient of His grace. What a gift! What a giver of grace He is! God, would you please continue to do the miraculous and allow me to be a part of sharing Your grace with all people in all things.

GOSPEL by Propaganda

This spoken word artist does a good job of communicating in a language that just might communicate to some you know who need the GOSPEL shared in another way.

The Gospel Project

I am pretty excited about this project that we are working on that I think will help Christ-followers see Christ for Who He is rather than reduce Him to our limited view of Him.

It Was 20 Years Ago Today . . . Again

Milestones. You know those events that come along that force you to "put a stake in the ground", "set up a marker", and cause you to remember. I can be a little nostalgic at times and especially when it comes to family and specifically our daughters. I tear up just thinking about them, their accomplishments, and how quickly time passes by in life.

Today, "Janjuary" 11th, Morgan turns 20 years old. She came into the world a little after 3am on a cold, January morning in Nashville, Tennessee. It was a pretty remarkable entry for me. When Sondra went into labor with Shelbi I was in FL at camp (see that story here), so all the lead up to birth was new to me even though it was my 2nd time to witness birth.

Morgan made a great entrance and has been entering everywhere since pretty much the same way. She has a quiet demeanor, but is full of life and is hysterical. She is accused many of times of being just like me, and in many ways she is, but there are numerous ways she is her own person. I remember the night she prayed to receive Christ. I remember the times she has made some hard decisions to "go against the crowd" when the crowd was engaging in some borderline or "over the line" behavior. She is friends with everyone. She is quick to be completely honest with those she loves and cares for deeply. She is a leader who began to blossom in her middle school years.

She is scared to death of birds and bugs but is slowly moving to just moderately immobilized at the sight of either of these creatures. She is prone to injury and strep although strep is becoming more of a thing of the past. She is a good student. She loves her sorority sisters and they love her. She has a heart for God and for people. You see her here serving with kids in Honduras. She loves gifts! And she is an incredible gift to our family and to all her know her!

Morgan, I love you. Thanks for all the joy you bring to our family. Thank you for teaching your dad much about life. Thanks for loving Christ and people.

One other thing . . . when you are lying on a hospital bed after surgery and you ask me, "Am I going to die." I will answer again, "Yes sugar. You are going to die, but today is not your day." I am just that kind of comforting father. Love you.